forgiveness

We humans give each other many opportunities to practice forgiveness.  Since sin entered the world with Adam and Eve, forgiveness has been a necessary part of life.  We were created by God for relationship and therefore, forgiveness is needed to reconcile us to God and to each other. 

I have longed for "thick skin" my entire life.  My feelings are easily hurt, many times unintentionally.  I often find myself in a position of choice...hold on to hurt and live in the past or forgive and walk into the future.  The Bible is very clear about which choice is the right one.

Make allowance for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you.  Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.  Colossians 3:13

If you forgive those who sin against you, your Heavenly Father will forgive you.  But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.  Matthew 6:14-15

Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior.  Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.  Ephesians 4:31-32

But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins too.  Mark 11:25

Some of us have deep wounds and ugly scars from circumstances and situations in the past that we carry with us every day.  It is time for forgiveness!  It is time for healing!  It is time to let go and walk into the future.  It might not be easy.  Carrying those hurts around becomes habit, and in a strange way, familiar and comforting. But that isn't God's best for us.  He wants us to be whole, healed, and complete so that we can love Him and other people with full hearts.  He sent His Only Son to be the sacrifice for our sins; to offer us forgiveness and reconciliation.  We certainly don't deserve it, but God gives us forgiveness in spite of ourselves and tells us to do the same with each other.

Be quick to ask for forgiveness.  And be quick to give forgiveness.  Life is too short to waste time with grudges and severed relationships.  I am choosing forgiveness.  Will you?

seen

O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.  You know when I sit down or stand up, you know my thoughts even when I'm far away.  You see me when I travel and when I rest at home.  You know everything I do.  You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.  You go before me and follow me.  You place your hand of blessing on my head.  Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! I can never escape from your Spirit!  I can never get away from your presence!  If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.  If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.  I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night-but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.  Psalm 139:1-12

I doubt that I am the only person who feels invisible sometimes.  I wonder if anyone would notice if I disappeared.  I wonder if anything I do makes any difference.

That's a horrible place for my brain to sit.  Before long, I have convinced myself that my life has no purpose.  And I know that isn't true!  Jeremiah 29:11 says that God knows the plans that he has for me and they are plans for good to give me a future and a hope!  So I obviously have purpose!

Psalm 139 is filled with evidence that I am NOT invisible!  Even if no one else notices, God sees everything I do.  He knows my heart and my thoughts.  He knows exactly where I am and exactly what I am going to say.  His hand is ALWAYS on me!  That's where I choose to let my brain sit.  I am SEEN by God...and that is all that matters!

Mom

Being a mom is one of the greatest blessings in my life.  It is also one of the most heart-wrenching challenges.  "Mom" is a huge part of who I am (if you ask my students, some of them would say I'm their "school mom"), but it is also my biggest insecurity.  I have the footsteps of amazing role models to follow...my mom and both of my grandmas, but not one of them is perfect.  (Sorry Mom!)  I don't know why I expect myself to have it all figured out!

 I see myself as fiercely loving, protecting, and encouraging.  (That's the view from the inside out, your perspective might be different!)  That part comes naturally to me most of the time...it's part of the person God made when He made me.  My goal as a mom is Proverbs 31:25-26.  "She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.  When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness." 

The Bible speaks of God as our loving Father, and I am grateful that earthly parents are tangible expressions of His love.  Moms are part of God's plan to love, teach, correct, guide, and care for us.  It is a hard job to be a mom.  I struggle to balance the need to correct and guide and teach my son with my deep desire to love him and make sure that he knows that I will ALWAYS love him.  I (and every other mom on this planet) am human, and I make mistakes every single day.  I need grace and I ask for forgiveness daily.  And I try to give grace and forgiveness freely. 

I have a lot to learn about being the mom God created me to be.  I'm grateful that I have a lifetime to keep working on it!

QUALITY (not quantity)

I am obsessed with numbers.  I'm a scientist and I grew up in a family of scientists.  In science, we use numbers to evaluate EVERYTHING...quantitative data is reliable data.  As a scientist and a woman, I am programmed to compare values.  But, I find myself assigning value to my own life with numbers and then comparing those numbers to the people around me.  IT'S A TRAP!  NUMBERS DO NOT DEFINE ME!  OR YOU!  It's time to expose the lies and believe the truth about who we are in Jesus!

Here's a list of just a few of the numbers that I have allowed to define me...

• the numbers on the scale
• the numbers on my Garmin watch (running distance and time)
• the numbers on my paycheck and in the bank and retirement accounts
• the numbers of "friends" and "followers" and "likes" on social media
• the numbers on my clothes
• the number of stamps in my passport
• the numbers in the test scores of my students
• the numbers of minutes that I spend praying and reading my Bible each day
• the number of child(ren) that I have

This list could go on and on...but you get the point.  I've allowed those numbers to lie to me...You are worthless.  You are not loved.  You are fat.  You are a failure.  You are boring.  If anyone knew those numbers, they would reject you.  Ridiculous, right?  I'm looking at that list and wondering why I allow it to communicate those feelings to me.  That's what lies are...ridiculous and the OPPOSITE of the truth.  

It's time to pursue QUALITY.  I am choosing that for myself, and I hope you will choose that too.  Healthy living...not for the numbers on the scale or my clothes, but for long and quality life.  Running for health...not for time and distance.  Using money wisely...not frivolously or hoarding.  Using social media to encourage and stay in touch with friends and family...not to define my worth.  Teaching the study of life and life lessons to my students to impact their lives...not for their test scores.  Making time with family and friends quality connection time...amount of time is irrelevant.  Being a quality mom to my #1 (and only) son...and knowing that he is already an amazing person!  Any time invested in my relationship with God is a wise investment!

It is time to end the obsession and the comparison!  It is going to be a process to change my stinking thinking.  Today is step one on a QUALITY journey!