I boldly declared this to be my New Year's resolution a week ago. My friend Robynn commented that I've been living this way as long as she has known me...quite a few years...and I hope that she is right. Fourteen years ago, I lost my first grandparent quite suddenly. Grandpa Dow was not the type to say "I love you" and I don't know that I had ever said "I love you" to him either. I remember crying with my grandma at the hospital and asking her if Grandpa knew that I loved him. She reassured me that he knew and that he loved me, and that was a turning point in my life. I decided then and there to live with no regrets; to love deeply and let people know. That fire was rekindled after my cancer adventure. Facing an uncertain future slapped me up the side of the head with the reality that I had not been living very intentionally nor loving as deeply as I wanted to. The truth is...none of us know when our last day here on Earth will be. When I am gone, I don't want anyone to wonder if I loved them...I want them to KNOW without a doubt! That being said, I don't say the words "I love you" lightly. When I say them, I mean them, and I don't go around saying them to just anyone.
As for living intentionally, it's time to take that up a notch! I don't want to just be surviving this life...I want to leave a mark! I want to make a positive impact on the lives of people around me...including my family and my students and my friends (which includes my colleagues!) and my community. But, as I have written before, I want to enjoy the journey...and that's where laughing frequently comes in! I don't want to get bogged down in the daily routines and live on auto-pilot. I don't want to be so serious about life that I forget to enjoy it! I want to be known as a person with a smile on her face and a joyous laugh and a hug that says even more than my words!
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